Sweater, n. Garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly.

Children who have proven themselves to be incorrigible by the age of twelve should be quickly and quietly beheaded, lest they grow to maturity, marry, and perpetuate the likeness of their being.

The fact that boys are allowed to exist at all is evidence of a remarkable Christian forebearance among men.

Childhood: the period of human life intermediate between the idiocy of infancy and the folly of youth - two removes from the sin of manhood and three from the remorse of age.