Are they topaz?” I ask, and he smiles slightly shyly, sitting up to face me. “Yes, they reminded me of the colour of your dress the night I made you mine.”“I’ve always been yours,” I whisper, and for a second I see the glint of tears in his eyes as he slowly pushes the ring onto my finger.

It’s okay babe,” I say softly, and he immediately relaxes and hugs me tight in a crushing hold. “Thank god,” he mutters. “I couldn’t bear it if we destroyed us Mabes. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”I make myself move back slightly. “I’m sure you’d manage,” I try to say lightly, and he grimaces. “I wouldn’t,” he says thickly. “You’re everything to me.

Oh good, you’re ready.”“No, I’ve only just got out of the bath. What should I put on?”“Put on?” he says in obvious mystification.“Well I’ve only got a towel on.” When he still doesn’t get it I sigh. God, he’s so dense sometimes. “Charlie, I haven’t got any knickers on,” I mutter.His eyes seem to darken and then he starts laughing. “Mabel, I’m shocked. What sort of massages have you been having? I’m not massaging down there however much you expect it. I’m not that type of boy!

Open this fucking door now Nell.”“Go away,” I shout furiously.“If you don’t open it I’m going to break the fucker down.”I’m horrified. “You wouldn’t do that. This is a really nice hotel.”“Nell, I’m a fucking rock star sweetheart. They’ll consider themselves lucky if there’s still a functioning TV in here when I leave. Now are you going to open this door?

I’m knackered now,” he admits. “I think you’re actually going to have to help me to the room.”I laugh. “Really, granddad? You rock stars should come with some sort of disclaimer, warning us that reality doesn’t always live up to the pretty package.

How are you doing?” he asks and I grimace. “Okay, okay,” he’s talking quickly now. “The boys and I had a discussion and then we voted, and as a majority we think that you should look at this.”“What is it?” I ask cautiously, looking at the iPad he’s proffering. “It’s not porn again is it, because I told Bram that it doesn’t help with all of life’s problems, but he won’t fucking listen.