I love to talk about nothing. It's the only thing I know anything about.

Oh! I killed Bunbury this afternoon... I mean poor Bunbury died this afternoon.What did he die of?Bunbury? Oh, he was exploded!

I don’t think I like American inventions [...] I am quite sure I don’t. I read some American novels lately, and they were quite nonsensical.

It is a much cleverer thing to talk nonsense than to listen to it.