20 Quotes by Alyssa B. Sheinmel

Part of us did die. Literally – that tissue on your face, the part they removed. It died. And you can’t recover from any kind of death without mourning it.

Before that, I listened to music as loud as I could, like I thought I could drown the pain out.

And I know that I would never, not in a million years, be kissing her like this with my hands in those places, if she hadn’t told me that I had moves, that I was smooth.

It’s 7:42 on a Tuesday when the phone rings. I only notice the time because I’m watching Wheel of Fortune, which is so boring that I think I might be better entertained if I turned off the TV and stared at the blank screen.

But then there she is, on her own, chewing gum, pulling her hair back with one hand and getting her MetroCard out with the other. Girls can do so much at once.

Whoever she is, and however close we become, my history will never be all twisted up with hers.

Our convesation is awkward, as though our friendship is another skill that I remember but can’t use anymore.

We can’t keep the people we love alive by putting our own lives on hold. In fact, we can’t put our lives on hold at all. Time marches on, even when we don’t want it to.

Maybe I have to stop trying to be one thing or another. Maybe I need to accept the ways I contradict myself. Maybe that’s what it is to be human.