1,237 Quotes by Ambrose Bierce

Admiration, n. Our polite recognition of another’s resemblance to ourselves.

A bad marriage is like an electrical thrilling machine: it makes you dance, but you can’t let go.

Deliberation, n.: The act of examining one’s bread to determine which side it is buttered on.

Nature’s fortuitous manifestation of her purposeless objectionableness.

HATRED, n. A sentiment appropriate to the occasion of another’s superiority.

LEAD, n. A heavy blue-gray metal much used in giving stability to light lovers – particularly to those who love not wisely but other men’s wives.

An army’s bravest men are its cowards. The death which they would not meet at the hands of the enemy they will meet at the hands of their officers, with never a flinching.

Good-bye – if you hear of my being stood up against a stone wall and shot to rags please know that I think that a pretty good way to depart this life. It beats old age, disease or falling down the cellar stairs.

SCARABAEUS, n. The sacred beetle of the ancient Egyptians, allied to our familiar “tumble-bug.” It was supposed to symbolize immortality, the fact that God knew why giving it its peculiar sanctity.