1,237 Quotes by Ambrose Bierce

Debt, n. An ingenious substitute for the chain and whip of the slavedriver.

He laughs best who laughs least.

EXISTENCE, n. A transient, horrible, fantastic dream,/ Wherein is nothing yet all things do seem:/ From which we're wakened by a friendly nudge/ Of our bedfellow Death, and cry: "O fudge!"

When you doubt, abstain.

Idiot, n. A member of a large and powerful tribe whose influence in human affairs has always been dominant and controlling.

REPARATION, n. Satisfaction that is made for a wrong and deducted from the satisfaction felt in committing it.

LIAR, n. One who tells an unpleasant truth.

A bird in the hand is worth what it will bring.

Edible, adj.: Good to eat, and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake to a pig, a pig to a man, and a man to a worm.