1,237 Quotes by Ambrose Bierce

To those who view the voyage of life from the port of departure the bark that has accomplished any considerable distance appears already in close approach to the farther shore.

MALTHUSIAN, adj. Pertaining to Malthus and his doctrines, who believed in artificially limiting population, but found that it could not be done by talking. Herod of Judea, all the famous soldiers have been practical exponents of the Malthusian idea.

Book - Learning : The dunce's derisive term for all knowledge that transcends his own impertinent ignorance.

A total abstainer is one who abstains from everything but abstention, and especially from inactivity in the affairs of others.

Immigrant: An unenlightened person who thinks one country better than another.

True, man does not know woman. But neither does woman.

LEGACY, n. A gift from one who is legging it out of this vale of tears.

Along the road of life are many pleasure resorts, but think not that by tarrying in them you will take more days to the journey. The day of your arrival is already recorded.

INFALAPSARIAN, n. One who ventures to believe that Adam need not have sinned unless he had a mind to - in opposition to the Supralapsarians, who hold that that luckless person's fall was decreed from the beginning.