1,237 Quotes by Ambrose Bierce

Human nature is pretty well balanced; for every lacking virtue there is a rough substitute that will serve at a pinch--as cunning is the wisdom of the unwise, and ferocity the courage of the coward.

HATRED, n. A sentiment appropriate to the occasion of another's superiority.

ARTLESSNESS, n. A certain engaging quality to which women attain by long study and severe practice upon the admiring male, who is pleased to fancy it resembles the candid simplicity of his young.

HUSBAND, n. One who, having dined, is charged with the care of the plate.

Botany, n. The science of vegetables - those that are not good to eat, as well as those that are. It deals largely with their flowers, which are commonly badly designed, inartistic in color, and ill-smelling.

He who thinks with difficulty believes with alacrity.

INTIMACY, n. A relation into which fools are providentially drawn for their mutual destruction.

Patriotism is as fierce as a fever, pitiless as the grave, blind as a stone, and irrational as a headless hen.

MOUTH, n. In man, the gateway to the soul; in woman, the outlet of the heart.