369 Quotes by Andy Rooney

Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them.

One of the most glorious messes in the world is the mess created in the living room on Christmas day. Don't clean it up too quickly.

Death is a distant rumor to the young.

Democrats believe people are basically good but must be saved from themselves by the government. Republicans believe people are basically bad but they'll be okay if they're left alone.

I've learned... that everyone you meet deserves to be greeted with a smile.

If I'd known how many problems I was going to run into before I finished, I can't remember a single project I would have started.

Don't you hate it when...your suitcase is the last one off the airplane?

I'm always on the lookout for something good about people. Often months go by.

If you smile when no one else is around, you really mean it.