369 Quotes by Andy Rooney

I don’t like food that’s too carefully arranged; it makes me think that the chef is spending too much time arranging and not enough time cooking. If I wanted a picture I’d buy a painting.

A cat’s idea of a ‘good time’ is to kill something.

New ideas are one of the most overrated concepts of our time. Most of the important ideas that we live with aren’t new at all.

I am not retiring. Writers don’t retire. Writers never stop writing.

We’re all torn between the desire for privacy and the fear of loneliness.

The Super Bowl isn’t for kids, I had a great time though and it was worth every nickel of it because by doing this lame piece about the game I can put it on my expense account.

All economists should be locked up until they admit that they don’t know what they’re talking about.

If you put on an item of clothing that hurts just because you have an idea it looks better or conforms to what other people are wearing, it’s dumb.

Taxes are important. President Bush’s tax proposals leave no rich person behind. Voters approve of President Bush helping the kind of people they wish they were one of.