369 Quotes by Andy Rooney

I think Dan [Rather] is transparently liberal. Now he may not like to hear me say that. I always agree with him, too. But I think he should be more careful.

The one affectation I have forced on the publisher ... are my apostrophe-free ellisions. Because I write my scripts to read myself, I dont spell 'don't' with an apostrophe. I spell it 'dont'. We all know the word and it seems foolish to put in an extraneous apostrophe. Punctuation marks are devices we use to make the meaning of sentences clear. There is nothing confusing about a word like 'dont' printed without an apostrophe to indicate an omitted letter.

People will generally accept facts as truth only if the facts agree with what they already believe.

It's not so much that I write well, I just don't write badly very often and that passes for good on television.

You're better off missing a bus or an airplane once in a while than you are getting there too early all the time.

It's paradoxical, that the idea of living a long life appeals to everyone, but the idea of getting old doesn't appeal to anyone.

All economists should be locked up until they admit that they don't know what they're talking about.

I never get over feeling bad about tearing open a beautifully wrapped present. It takes ten seconds to destroy a work of art that took someone ten minutes to accomplish.

Vegetarian - that's an old Indian word meaning lousy hunter.