571 Quotes by Augusten Burroughs

After I got my coffee, I leaned against a stop sign and sipped, pretending it was a normal day and I was only up this early so that I could go running and not because I’d just been on a killing spree.

Another quite useful and healthy outlet for anger is writing. Even if you “can’t write.” Because actually, if you can speak, you can write. It’s just a period of adjustment using your fingers instead of your mouth. But if you write – or type – exactly what you’re thinking, without even a single change, when you read it, whatever you wrote will sound like you, talking. That’s writing. No MFA required. Especially if what you’re going to write is a letter.

I just look at her and she creeps me out. She looks like she would eat a baby. Not that she’s fat. She just looks hungry in some dangerous way that can’t be explained. She’s always so nice and friendly. Exactly the disposition of a baby killer.

Lately, I am receiving numerous calls each night from telemarketers. They’re calling with the frequent urgency of dumped boyfriends. At this point, I cannot help but wonder, is the entire telemarketing industry one big, jilted, clingy gay guy?

You need to grab your dream out of the sky like it’s a kite and pinch the string through your fingers until you reach the spool.

I wouldn’t want to waste any of my brain cells on forgiving if it’s holding me back.

I never question the way I write. Writing is the only thing that’s without seams for me. It’s an effort to talk because my pictures have to be turned into these sounds. It’s an effort to be alive. It’s work. But writing is wonderful.

Optimism sprouts from the knowledge that you are in control of your own life, not your past and not those around you. Part of being in control is taking responsibility for how you feel. This means not just admitting to uncomfortable feelings but then examining your circumstances to see what can be done to change these feelings at the source. Real optimism is not the pep talk you give yourself. It is earned through the labor involved in emotional housekeeping.

The best person you can be is the person you are when you are alone on a random Thursday. That’s who you are.