99 Quotes by Ben Elton

They were the Saturday Club, a secret society of which only the four of them were aware and which none other could join.

To positively discriminate in favour of groups that have been negatively discriminated against in the past.

I see dull people as projects ... to be reformed

I threaten to kill lots of people. But it doesn’t actually mean that in a tweet.’ ‘Mean what?’ ‘Mean that you actually want to kill them. It’s more like “Oh, I disagree with you. Maybe you should think things through more”, that sort of thing.

When the phone rings at 2.15am in the morning it's unlikely to be heralding something pleasant. What chance is there of its being good news? None. Only someone bad would ring at such an hour. Or someone with bad news.

Artists don't create society, they reflect it

With privilege comes responsibility, you must understand that. People expect us to lead by example and we shall not disappoint them.

The reactionary point of view was always so easy to put, the complex, radical argument always so easy to put down.

She spoke loudly in order to be heard above the noise of personal communitainers that were thudding and banging all around them. Some people used earphones, some didn't, clearly believing that as many people as possible should be given the opportunity to appreciate their musical taste. That, combined with the mass leakage from the headsets, created a terrible din and even discreet private conversations had to be conducted at a yell.