221 Quotes by Bob Saget

I’m fortunate to know a lot of incredibly talented people, and they all want to be a penguin.

If someone sprays windex in your food it can give you diarrhea. But once you wipe it off your windows, you’re fine.

I like to approach every day like it’s my first, so this morning when I woke up I covered my body with red gelatin.

Just went to a lovely Catholic wedding. I need a drink. They didn’t even offer us water. Well they did, but it was Holy water.

When you’re famous, you’re always famous. It doesn’t go away.

It’s a new day: Full of promise and love. The only thing that can take away that great feeling is – reading the news or speaking to people.

My dad told me if I was ever intimidated by anyone, just picture them with their clothes off. He said that’s how he dealt with my mom.

It’s okay to get stoned, as long as its not by other people.

It’s 103 comedians, or however many it is, and how would everyone tell it. It’s enough people of substance that it makes you think of the people who aren’t there that are alive.