13 Quotes by Brian Katcher

I'm so well-rounded I'm almost spherical.

I had two beady brown eyes that, no matter how hard I tried to look mysterious and cool, always seemed to say "It wasn't just me who farted.

Nothing like the soft touch of a woman. Her smooth skin...or her rough scars.

I expected a nod and maybe a handshake, but Dan clasped his hand to his chest, whispered something like "Chthulhu fh'tagn!" and spit into a urinal.

Dude, I totally pendejo!" he said, happily calling himself an asshole.

I knew the risks. All part of being on the quiz bowl team. Not everyone makes it back alive.

She turns to me, and for a moment I fear she’s turning into the She-Hulk. After a second, I realize that her eyes are just really green, kind of like two angry Life Savers.

Sage would survive. I’d survive. We were better off apart. Painful and quick, just like ripping off a Band-Aid. Well, more like gouging a piece of shrapnel out of my stomach, pouring a bottle of gin into the wound, lighting it on fire, and sewing my guts up with a dirty bootlace. But the concept was the same.

At a con there’s one hundred percent acceptance, no ifs, ands, or buts. This is the one place where anyone can go and not be judged.