139 Quotes by Charlie Brooker

Here's a mystery for you. Renegade urban graffiti artist Banksy is clearly a guffhead of massive proportions, yet he's often feted as a genius straddling the bleeding edge of now. Why? Because his work looks dazzlingly clever to idiots. And apparently that'll do.

Your grades are not your destiny: they’re just letters and numbers which rate how well you performed in one artificial arena, once.

Man the lifeboats. The idiots are winning.

If technology is a drug – and it does feel like a drug – then what, precisely, are the side-effects?

Whenever I tell people I’m a misanthrope they react as though that’s a bad thing, the idiots. I live in London, for God’s sake. Have you walked down Oxford Street recently? Misanthropy’s the only thing that gets you through it. It’s not a personality flaw, it’s a skill.

In summary, our world is doomed.

Technology is a global thing and wherever you go, people are prodding the same devices and worrying in the same way and have had their lives slightly altered in the same way.

Hi-def is merely the latest in a string of evolutional leaps that have transformed the way we sit slumped in front of a box wishing we were dead.

When you’re being earnest, people think you’re being sarcastic and when you’re being sarcastic, they think you’re being earnest. The moral in all this, of course, is that people should never attempt to communicate.