49 Quotes by Chris Farley

I’m just dandy, I got a bowl of chocolate pudding in my underpants.

Brothers don’t shake hands, brothers gotta HUG!!!

People need a time to laugh. It’s up to us to bonk ourselves on the head and slip on a banana peel so the average guy can say, ‘I may be bad, honey, but I’m not as much of an idiot as that guy on the screen.’

Once I thought that if I just had enough in the bank, if I had enough fame, that it would be all right. But I’m a human being like everyone else. I’m not exempt.

I have a tendency toward the pleasures of the flesh. It’s a battle for me, as far as weight and things like that. But I’m curbing them because I want to continue to do comedy, and the two don’t mix. So I try to fight those demons.

The point is, how do you know the Guarantee Fairy isn’t a crazy glue sniffer.

I used to think that you could get to a level of success where the laws of the universe didn’t apply. But they do. It’s still life on life’s terms, not on movie-star terms. I still have to work at relationships. I still have to work on my weight and some of my other demons.

In the land of the skunks, he who has half a nose is king.

I don't know what the future holds. All I know is, I'm good today. Real good.