653 Quotes by Christopher Moore

Jody noticed that the kid was focused on the breasts, which were defying gravity, and apparently death itself, by standing there at complete attention

[Abby to Tommy and Jody who are hugging]So I'm like, "Cold-faced killers on the clock, bitches, we don't have time for your bonery right now."--The Chronicles of Abby Normal

My name," said Mr. Fresh."Pardon?" Charlie stopped tying himself up."I dress in mint green because of my first name. It's Minty."Charlie completely forgot what he was worried about. "Minty? Your name is Minty Fresh?"Charlie appeared to be trying to stifle a sneeze, but then snorted an explosive laugh. Then ducked.

»Du hast Heiden vernichtet? Ich dachte, die Erdgeister seien wohlgesinnt.«»Jeder hat mal Aussetzer.

Das Leben war Handeln, es gab keinen Frieden diesseits des Grabes.

»Das Prinzip Moral verstehe ich nicht.«»Das überrascht mich nicht im geringsten.«

doch ihre Gegenwart hatte in ihm stets das Gefühl ausgelöst, daß seine eheliche Treue lediglich eine absurde Wahnvorstellung war.

Sam tried to think of a quick explanation, but was too weary from lack of sleep to tackle the concept of Las Vegas in twenty-five words or less. Finally he said, “These are places where you go if you want to fuck up your life and you don’t have a lot of time to do it in.”“Are we going to stop?”“No, I seem to be fucking up at a fine rate of speed, thank you.

Minty now held his arms out to his sides, angry Jesus style, suffer all the bitch-ass motherf*ckers need an ass-whoopin' unto me, for I shall rain wrath down upon them -- that look.