653 Quotes by Christopher Moore

Cofishes-other fish in a group, coworkers, cohorts, etc. Shut up, it’s a word.

I know that even now, having watched enough television, you probably won’t even refer to them as lepers so as to spare their feelings. You probably call them ‘parts-dropping-off challenged’ or something.

The entire city of Las Vegas – plastic opulence, treasure for the taking, vulgar towers, and cocktail waitresses with improbable breasts – is built on the self-delusion of the Beta Male.

It’s hard for me, a Jew, to stay in the moment. Without the past, where is the guilt? And without the future, where is the dread? And without guilt and dread, who am I?

He loved constantly, instantly, spontaneously, without thought or words. That’s what he taught me. Love is not something you think about, it is a state in which you dwell. That was his gift.

Of course they won’t bloody remember, they’ll be dead.′ Then she called him a name in a dead language that translated, roughly, to ‘poop on a stick,’ but sounded more succinct, like this: ‘Of course they won’t bloody remember, they’ll be dead, Poopstick.

Green eggs, or not green eggs? That is the question. Whether ’tis nobler in the mind to eat them in a box, with a fox –.

Then someone started pounding on the door. And not a little “Hey, what’s up?” pound. Like there was a big sale on door pounds down at the Pound Outlet. Buy one, get one free at Pounds-n-Stuff. – Being the Journal of Abby Normal.

A wall is the defense of a country that values inaction. But a wall imprisons the people of a country as much as it protects them.