395 Quotes by Chuck Klosterman

I hate motorcycles. Because if I hit one, even if it’s not my fault, if I’ve done nothing wrong, I’m not charged with manslaughter, he’s gonna die, because he’s on a motorcycle. So I have to live my life knowing that I killed this guy.

We live in an age where virtually no content is lost and virtually all content is shared. The sheer amount of information about every current idea makes those concepts difficult to contradict, particularly in a framework where public consensus has become the ultimate arbiter of validity. In other words, we’re starting to behave as if we’ve reached the end of human knowledge. And while that notion is undoubtedly false, the sensation of certitude it generates is paralyzing.

The mass media causes sexual misdirection: It prompts us to need something deeper than what we want. This is why Woody Allen has made nebbish guys cool; he makes people assume there is something profound about having a relationship based on witty conversation and intellectual discourse. There isn’t. It’s just another gimmick, and it’s no different than wanting to be with someone because they’re thin or rich or the former lead singer of Whiskeytown.

To me, every interview, even if you love the artist, needs to be somewhat adversarial. Which doesn’t mean you need to attack the person, but you do need to look at it like you’re trying to get information that has not been written about before.

That’s like comparing apples with hermaphroditic ground sloths.

When I’m walking around, I’m usually drinking pop, so I can’t have a mask on. That’s why I couldn’t be a surgeon.

History is defined by people who don’t really understand what they are defining.

Why don’t I like crowds? I suppose the worst possible thing I could say is that I don’t like people, and that crowds are just collections of people. That seems like a very nihilistic way to look at the world.

The biggest hurdle to writing Fargo Rock City was that I couldn’t afford a home computer – I had to get a new job so I could buy a computer. It could all change though. In five years, I could be back at some daily newspaper, which wouldn’t be so bad.