73 Quotes by Colin Jost

Having Twitter on your phone is like being with a journalist that hates you 24 hours a day. Anything you say on that can be spun. Truly, that's what you have to think of it as.

My mom was the breadwinner in my family. I always thought, 'That's how it is.' I never thought that was the exception.

It's not an easy job to think creatively and then also have to think logistically.

I did go to college with him, but everyone's always like, 'Did you meet Mark Zuckerberg? Did you hang out with him?' and I'm like, 'No,' because he was in a lab creating Facebook, and I was, like, learning about alcohol. Well, we did go to school, and I think I'm not really benefiting from that relationship in any way.

I never thought about 'being' in comedy when I grew up, because I didn't know it was a real job. But looking back, it's the only thing I ever really cared about.

Learning to be your natural self in front of five cameras and a silent studio takes time. Trying to be funny under duress is probably a lot like trying to play golf relaxed under pressure.

I didn't understand when somebody thanked me for writing a good sketch, because it was something I wanted to do, but now I totally get it, because when someone writes something great for me, I'm so appreciative.

I commuted an hour and a half each way to high school in N.Y.C. I took a bus, a ferry, then a subway.

Montauk is a little more raw and rugged than the other parts of the Hamptons, and I like that.