143 Quotes by Craig Kilborn

President Bush is trying to put a positive spin on the latest bad economic numbers. Today he declared victory in the 'War on Jobs.'

Hillary Clinton has finished writing her book where she says her marriage couldn't be stronger, and Bill just finished his book titled 'Chicks I Nailed While Hillary was Writing Her Book.'

Singer Boy Dylan was stopped at his own sow by security guards who failed to recognize the singer. Asked to comment, Dylan replied, 'I can hardly blame them. Look at me.'

It's not a big part, ... I wheel in an ultrasound machine and say to Taylor's gynecologist, 'If you have a problem with it, just give it a light tap on the side.' Then they hand me a urine sample, and I put it up to the light and say 'Hmm, looks pretty healthy, but I'll check.'

Arnold Schwarzenegger announced he's running for governor. He's got a great slogan - 'Vote for me, or I'll make 'Kindergarten Cop II

In a new poll 54 percent believed President Bush exaggerated the size of Iraq's missile threat. Hey, he's a guy.

Democrats were quick to point out that President Bush's budget creates a 1 trillion dollar deficit. The White House quickly responded with 'Hey, look over there, it's Saddam Hussein.'

I would do that and watch him, and it's depressing 'cause he is that good,

John Kerry was officially endorsed by Dick Gephardt, and Kerry said, 'What did I ever do to you?'