350 Quotes by Dane Cook

I'm going to hell, ah... but you're laughing, so you're coming.

I don't laugh out loud at comics a lot.

I feel like the gods have certainly patted me on the head.

If my voice can resonate that way with kids, maybe it will resonate through 'Planes' as well, and they'll hear that little something that I'm giving to them, a performance that says to them, "I want to try." It's all interconnected. I don't think it's thinking too deeply about it.

I like to play guitar, jam out, play the blues, go watch movies. I love movies.

They used to beat me up after Sunday School, I used to get beat up... yeah, that's a nice little thank you from Jesus.

I work with a lot of kids. Every year, for the past fifteen years, I work at Comedy Camp where I work with a lot of kids.

I'm completely ecstatic when a woman has own back story and brings something to the table and has a real strong kind of independence.

I don't like when juice wears tights, its a horrible combination when juice wears tights.