821 Quotes by Daniel Handler

People can expect poisonous mushrooms, ... And then only if they open the book.

I’m reminded of a book my father used to read me,” she said. “A bunch of elves and things get into a huge war over a piece of jewelry that everybody wants but nobody can wear.

Tears are curious things, for like earthquakes or puppet shows, they can occur at any time, without any warning and without any good reason.

I suppose I'll have to add the force of gravity to my list of enemies.

Keep anyone with whom you can read in silence.

It was a curious feeling, that something could be so close and so distant at the same time.

A nice thing about children's books, though I'm probably alone in this opinion among people who write and publish them, is that they did get to be in this unrecognized ghetto for a long time.

Knowing that something is wrong and doing it anyway happens very often in life, and I doubt I will ever know why.

It is difficult, when faced with a situation you cannot control, to admit you can do nothing.