821 Quotes by Daniel Handler

Opera was an enormous part of my childhood. My parents were both opera buffs, and they met in the box seat of an opera performance. And I also was a boy soprano, so before puberty hit, I was onstage playing a wide variety of orphans and urchins in all sorts of operas, and the sheer melodrama of their stories was just always appealing to me.

Siblings that say they never fight are most definitely hiding something

They didn't understand it, but like so many unfortunate events in life, just because you don't understand it doesn't mean it isn't so.

But we can also ask for something we are much more likely to get, and that is to find a person or two, somewhere in our travels, who will tell us that we are noble enough, whether it is true or not. We can ask for someone who will say, “You are noble enough,” and remind us of our good qualities when we have forgotten them, or cast them into doubt.

If you wish to avoid an unpleasant story you had best put this book down

I hadn't even been looking, not for you, and now you were my heart's desire.

They looked at each other like a pair of parentheses.

But one type of book that practically no one likes to read is a book about the law. Books about the law are notorious for being very long, very dull, and very difficult to read. This is one reason many lawyers make heaps of money. The money is an incentive - the word "incentive" here means "an offered reward to persuade you to do something you don't want to do - to read long, dull, and difficult books.

I started making plans, thinking we would get that far.