821 Quotes by Daniel Handler

How do you do?" said Violet. "How do you do?" said Klaus. "Odo yow!" said Sunny.

There is only laughing across the land as the car moves you along, on your way someplace with love in the car.

You know I want to be a director, but you could never truly see the movies in my head and that, Ed, is why we broke up.

Love can smack you like a seagull, and pour all over your feet like junk mail.

It is always terrible to be told to go play with people one doesn’t know...

Arguing with somebody is never pleasant, but sometimes it is useful and necessary to do so.

Tell it to everyone you know, but pretend you're kidding.

Frustration is an interesting emotional state, because it tends to bring out the worst in whoever is frustrated.

Wherever there’s a conductor, you’re sure to find a dead composer!