821 Quotes by Daniel Handler

—¿No lo sabes…? Pero acabas… acabas de gastarte cincuenta y cinco dólares en este libro.—Lo sé —respondiste—. No pasa nada.—Pero ¿no sabes por qué?—Para hacerte feliz —fue lo único que dijiste, y de repente, Ed, tus palabras me dejaron sin respiración.

Fucking delish, I don't care if it's a faggy word, oops, sorry, no offense, sorry again. [i]Delish! Criminy![/i] This is like a cookie, it tastes like a cookie having sex with a doughnut.

Beautiful.

If he’s not gay and he hung out with you the whole time, he wanted to be. It’s boyfriend or want to be boyfriend or I guess gay. Those are the choices.

A note, who writes a note like that? Who were you to write one to me? it boomed inside me the whole time, an explosion over and over, the joy of what you wrote to me jumpy shrapnel in my bloodstream. I can't have it near me anymore, I'm grenading it back to you, as soon as I unfold it and read it and cry one more time. Because me too, and fuck you. Even now.

But it’s December now, and the sky is bright, and it’s clear to me. I’m telling you why we broke up, Ed. I’m writing it in this letter, the whole truth of why it happened. And the truth is that I goddamn loved you so much.

The movie was kickass, which was appropriate, because tonight it was called Kickass: The Movie.

I know you can't see it, not you, Ed, but maybe if I tell you the whole plot you'll understand it this once, because even now I want you to see it. I don't love you anymore, of course I don't, but there's still something I can show you. You know I want to be a director, but you never truly see the movies in my head and that, Ed, is why we broke up.

How many happy people do you think there are in the world? Twelve?