821 Quotes by Daniel Handler

There are secrets everywhere. I think everyone’s parents have secrets. You just have to know where to look for them.

All his life, Klaus had believed that if you read enough books, you could solve any problem, but now he wasn’t so sure.

I thought it was one thing but it was the other, it was zero zero zero alone on the bus while you slept in the room I had to leave, and that’s why we broke up.

Adverbs is a book about love, and I thought that was pretty cheerful, but people who are reading it now are telling me that it’s actually quite dark.

No matter who you are, no matter where you live, and no matter how many people are chasing you, what you don’t read is often as important as what you do read.

When you start reading nonfiction books about piracy, you realize that it’s actually just a history of desperate people.

It’s why we broke up, Ed, a small thing that’s disappeared or maybe was never really in my hands in the first place.

Who can I complain to, if I don’t like the shape of the globe?

Mostly, it’s flattering to meet fans. As long as it’s in a planned, professional meeting, rather than, say, someone dropping by my home, which is not as pleasant.