675 Quotes by Darynda Jones

Her dad shows up, and instead of getting mad at Denise, he wraps his arm around her and helps her to his car like she's crippled. I could've crippled her. Missed my chance.

Still, this whole grim reaper thing should have come with a manual. Or a diagram of some kind. A flowchart would have been nice.

How would you like your eggs?"I tried. I really did. But I glanced at his crotch and it came out anyway. "Fertilized?

A sheriff arrested me. I could be mistaken, but I'm pretty sure my men-in-uniform fetish began that day. The sheriff was hot. And he handcuffed me. I've never been the same.

Hey, wait," I said, pulling back, "you are the son of Satan. Maybe we need a safe word."His grin morphed into something wickedly charming. "Okay, how about, 'Oh, my god, it's so big.'"Laughter burst out of me before I could stop it. Not that it wasn't. "That would be a safe phrase, but okay." I thought about it, then said, "How about 'Is that all you've got?

A split second later, my life flashed before my eyes, and I came to one important conclusion about it.It was fun while it lasted.

Is that what you think? That I follow you around to keep your ass out of trouble?""If so, you're not very good at your job."A huge smile spread across his face. "True enough. So what's eating you? Because, sadly, it's not me.

My powers of persuasion are only as strong as the bullshit I have to back it up.- Charley Davidson

I noticed you tore down Donovan's house."He lifted his gaze until it locked with mine. "He's alive because he left town. His house chose to stay. It paid the price.