373 Quotes by Dorothy Parker

Love is like quicksilver in the hand. Leave the fingers open and it stays. Clutch it, and it darts away.

I like to have a martini, / Two at the very most. / After three I'm under the table, / After four I'm under my host.

...I have been fed, in my youth, a lot of old wives' tales about the way men would instantly forsake a beautiful woman to flock around a brilliant one. It is but fair to say that, after geting out in the world, I had never seen this happen.

I suppose if I ever wrote a play about myself, I'd be sued for plagiarism.

The only 'ism' in Holywood is plagiarism.

How do people go to sleep? I'm afraid I've lost the knack. I might try busting myself smartly over the temple with the nightlight. I might repeat to myself, slowly and soothingly, a list of quotations beautiful from minds profound; if I can remember.

They sicken of the calm, who know the storm

Money cannot buy health, but I'd settle for a diamond-studded wheelchair.

Drink, and dance and laugh and lie… Love the reeling midnight through… For tomorrow we shall die!