201 Quotes by Drew Carey

Things don’t make me nearly as happy as talking and having a beer with my friends. And that’s something everyone can do.

I was just sick of being fat, you know? You get sick of it. It just really, it’s a tiring lifestyle to have.

I don’t run outside, honestly. Sometimes I go out around my house, but mainly it’s the stupid treadmill. I wish I had a better answer, but I’m very businesslike about my runs.

I’m not a good lover, but at least I’m fast.

I don’t care if my jokes are appropriate for a kid.

People laugh to forget their troubles, and to forget their troubles they like to look at people who aren’t doing better than they are.

What right does a politician have to tell me what I can and cannot watch? Change the channel if you don’t like what’s on TV!

My cranky cardiologist says I’m destined to die in the kitchen.

I wish I could end every rap song I didn’t like with a buzzer.