641 Quotes by Ellen DeGeneres

Take a nap in a fireplace and you’ll sleep like a log.

You know, it’s hard work to write a book. I can’t tell you how many times I really get going on an idea, then my quill breaks. Or I spill ink all over my writing tunic.

The stand up, everything was accidental. I never grew up and was the class clown and had to get the attention. It was – it really is, I have a career despite myself.

Normal is getting dressed in clothes that you buy for work and driving through traffic in a car that you are still paying for – in order to get to the job you need to pay for the clothes and the car, and the house you leave vacant all day so you can afford to live in it.

We’re just trying to find happiness in the bodies and minds we were given, like everyone else.

I never see the glass half empty because I drink out the bottle.

I think gender plays a part in most things, but I don’t know how it would be different because I’ve never been a man. And my fame is different from Nicole Kidman’s or Sharon Stone’s. I think everybody’s fame is different.

Why can’t rappers just say nice things? Like I wanna take your clothes off and hang them up in the closet real nice.

I’m going to be kind, because then it all just kind of spreads, and the world is a little nicer out there.