606 Quotes by Eoin Colfer

Trying to trace the consequences of time travel is like a monkey with no thumbs trying to reassemble an exploded bomb, at night, wearing clown gloves.- Professor Charles Smart

I often think I should just abandon the whole thing. I really do. Time travel could be a gift to humanity. Whoever controls it could do some real good for mankind. But you have to ask yourself, with humanity's track record, is that likely?- Professor Charles Smart

Time travel causes chaos, and chaos doesn't follow your rules. That's why it's called chaos, dummy.- Professor Charles Smart

I am Butler. Anything I say sounds scary.

The sun was already long past the spire when Garrick purchased a mug of coffee from his regular man on the tip of Oxford Street. But his palate had been educated by 21st century coffee, and he judged this mug as bilge water not fit for the Irish.

Have you ever heard of the theory of relativity?"Artemis blinked. "Is this a joke? I have traveled through time, Doctor. I think I know a little something about relativity.

I know what dissipate means, Arty. I'm not three, for heaven's sake.

Conor, I could search the world for another swashbuckling scientist, but I doubt if I would find one like you.

In my experience, boys are predictable. As soon as they think of something, they do it. Girls are smarter—they plan ahead. They think about not getting caught.