606 Quotes by Eoin Colfer

Holly wanted to be sure she understood what was being said. “So you’re saying that Shelly is going to light a fart?” “No, Shelly is going to light the fart. He has stored enough methane to power Haven for a year. There hasn’t been a fart like this since the last dwarf tribal gathering.

What I did was shameful. I was weak and I will carry regret for the rest of my life.

Artemis smiled grimly. And for a moment, he felt like his old, conniving self, before Holly and his mother had introduced him to their pesky moral codes.

Cosmo sank into a near trancelike state. The events of the past few days bounced around his head like blobs of oil in a lava lamp. Who was he now? Cosmo Hill fugitive no-sponsor, or Cosmo Hill Supernaturalist? Who was Cosmo Hill anyhow? A product of Clarissa Frayne, with no personality to speak of. Fourteen years old and he had never kissed a girl.

Mona was half ninja, half gunslinger, popping off charge after charge into the blue creatures.

I don’t trust any of you.

Certainly, Doctor. Let’s talk about your chair. Victorian?

The Brill brothers fled to the cockpit, trying to simultaneously bow, look at their feet, not think anything dangerous, and above all, not pass wind.

Holly: Seven and a half hours to save the world. Isn’t there some law that says we get twenty-four? Artemis: I don’t think Opal pays much attention to laws.