753 Quotes by Evan Esar

If you want to be successful, you must either have a chance or take one.

There's only one kind of common sense but a thousand varieties of stupidity.

The car was invented as a convenient place to sit out traffic jams

The most uncommon form of intelligence is common sense.

[A mathematician is a] scientist who can figure out anything except such simple things as squaring the circle and trisecting an angle.

Charm is to a woman what perfume is to a flower.

Etymology: from Latin ad-, "to" + visum, past participle of videre, "to see". Advice is what you get from your parents when you are growing up, and from your children when you are growing old.

The first requisite for a good cup of coffee in the morning is to get your wife out of bed.

It takes hundreds of nuts to hold a car together, but it takes only one of them to scatter it all over the highway.