579 Quotes by Fran Lebowitz

Original thought is like original sin: both happened before you were born to people you could not have possibly met.

I don't believe in anything you have to believe in.

Polite conversation is rarely either.

Your life story would not make a good book. Don't even try.

When I fly, I'm never afraid the plane is going to crash. But there have often been times when I was afraid it wouldn't crash. I was just afraid it was going to circle O'Hare for the rest of my life.

This idea that people have to love and understand each other is absurd. It's not human nature.

Did it ever occur to anyone that if you put nice libraries in public schools you wouldn't have to put them in prisons?

If thine enemy offend thee, give his child a drum.

Being a woman is of special interest only to aspiring male transsexuals. To actual women, it is simply a good excuse not to play football.