579 Quotes by Fran Lebowitz

The Italians are the most civilized people. And they’re very warm. Basically, they’re Jews with great architecture.

Albert Einstein didn’t care where he lived. Albert Einstein was a genius. Albert Einstein wasn’t getting lost in the master bedroom, he was lost in thought.

In Rome people spend most of their time having lunch. And they do it very well – Rome is unquestionably the lunch capital of the world.

You can’t go around hoping that most people have sterling moral characters. The most you can hope for is that people will pretend that they do.

The French probably invented the very notion of discretion. It’s not that they feel that what you don’t know won’t hurt you; they feel that what you don’t know won’t hurt them. To the French lying is simply talking.

Commercials and sometimes other guests – it’s the down side of TV. Other people – it’s the downside of life in general.

It’s much easier to write a solemn book than a funny book. It’s harder to make people laugh than it is to make them cry. People are always on the verge of tears.

When someone asks, ‘Why do you think he’s not calling me?’ there’s always one answer – ‘He’s not interested.’ There’s not ever any other answer.

When I’m supposed to be writing I clean my apartment, take my clothes to the laundry, get organized, make lists, do the dishes. I would never do a dish unless I had to write.