33 Quotes by Fred Barnett

The kids found the new high tensile Duncan Yo-Yo string was strong enough to use as a garrotte.

G had fallen asleep and tumbled into the motor assembly of the Ferris wheel. It spat him out.

Bernie let out the most pitiful wail heard since that god-forsaken day in 1942 when Bambi’s mom was shot.

Keeeerist! Look at the smile on the poor sumbiche’s face. Ain't seen anything like that since the B.J. Killer was alive." —Shark Fin Soup

They have no discipline. They’ll still need us.” “Ha!” said Postel. “No discipline? Behold!!!! My cat has written a book! ...And she's published!" — Amok 2015

The Stranger: Darkness warshed over the Dude - darker'n a black steer's tookus on a moonless prairie night. There was no bottom.