277 Quotes by Greg Behrendt

I will go anywhere if you say the phrase 'there might be cake.' I would go to the Department of Motor Vehicles, register somebody else's boat in Spanish, a language I do not speak, without ID - for cake.

I'm no longer a prisoner of my fears. Which really just means I'm using real butter.

She didn't love me that much, but she moved in with me. That's a plus. And then one night, I caught her making out with another dude on the driveway. That's a minus.

He's just not that into you if he's not asking you out. Because if he likes you, trust me, he will ask you out.

Life's biggest rewards come from the biggest challenges

Cheaters are people who have a lot of stuff to work out, and they're working it out on your time and with your heart.

Men like to chase and you have to let us chase you. I know. It's insulting. It's frustrating. It's unfortunately the truth.

Uncool is a cool resting place. The pressure's off me.

I'm fascinated with human relationships. I advocate the relationship you have with yourself.