48 Quotes by Jeff Garlin

I was very specific as to what the special would be because I had just directed Jon and Dennis. The difference was that mine included a lot more stand-up and Larry's included more behind-the-scenes.

Whenever I meet someone who's talented, I always want to write something for them!

Why do I want to be challenged or have challenges? That's why I don't go climb mountains.

Directing is really my favorite thing to do, but if I never directed again, I'd be okay if all the work I did was good.

First off, I don't do self-deprecation comedy based on being fat. I would always talk about it honestly. Secondly, I don't care how much I weigh.

I've avoided doing network shows because I don't think they're true to real families.

Acting's fine if the script's written by Paddy Chayefsky and Martin Scorsese directs it, but unless you have something like that, I don't really enjoy acting.

For me, baseball is more comparable to chess than it is to hockey.

Forget 'full of myself,' I'm not remotely impressed with myself.