278 Quotes by Jerome K. Jerome

Among all nations there should be vast temples raised where people might worship in silence and listen to it, for it is the voice of God.

There is this advantage about German beer: it does not make a man drunk as the word drunk is understood in England. There is nothing objectionable about him; he is simply tired. He does not want to talk; he wants to be let alone, to go to sleep; it does not matter where – anywhere.

I love the chill October days, when the brown leaves lie thick and sodden underneath your feet.

It all comes of being so attractive, as the old lady said when she was struck by lightning.

Swearing relieves the feelings – that is what swearing does. I explained this to my aunt on one occasion, but it didn’t answer with her. She said I had no business to have such feelings.

There must be something ghostly in the air of Christmas – something about the close, muggy atmosphere that draws up the ghosts, like the dampness of the summer rains brings out the frogs and snails.

A boy’s muscles move quicker than his thoughts.

We must not think of the things we could do with, but only of the things that we can’t do without.

What readers ask nowadays in a book is that it should improve, instruct, and elevate. This book wouldn’t elevate a cow.