559 Quotes by Jim Gaffigan

I like bowling. It's just one of those things where I can do so many jokes about it because I do know bowling. Somebody once said, "The whitest things in the world are Jim Gaffigan and bowling."

I'm definitely hesitant wearing shorts during the summer. Like for a pale person, you know, summer - everyone in the world is so excited for summer, but pale people, we're just like, oh no.

There are people that are vegetarians that love bacon.

If someone picks up one thing you've written, you want them to go, 'Wow, this is pretty good.'

I believe that comedians do what they do, and then they get credit or criticism for doing it. There's nothing planned about this.

There are some people who know who I am but there are a lot of people that have no idea who I am - which is not to say that that's a bad thing.

I'm a guy who comes from a small town in the Midwest. It's not in my nature to say the most explicit things in public.

I'm not a foodie; I'm an eatie. I don't have anything against foodies. I just don't have the time or the interest to do that much research.

In stand up, you get an awareness of how you come across, but in acting there is almost a hyper-awareness on how you might be physically perceived.