139 Quotes by Johnny Vegas

Writing a book about yourself is like therapy, and you go ‘Oh My God, that’s the reason that happened.’ Writing about it, you’re forced to really examine things.

My agent once said, ‘You’re not very driven.’ And it’s true. I’m not the type to ring up and go, ‘Get me this part!’

If an original piece of wardrobe came up from Star Wars, I’d probably spend a lot of money on it.

There’s a domino effect with certain things you say.

With stand-up you’ve just got that one chance. Audiences can be quite fickle.

When I wasn’t as attractive as I am now, I suffered at the hands of cruel children and their taunts until I realised that confidence and a bit of aesthetic care can overcome that.

I think if you’re at the point where you’re popular enough to sell your wedding photos to OK! Magazine then you don’t need the money.

You can’t be a proper comic unless you’ve been out on stage and felt the fear.

I struggle as a writer, and I’m convinced that if I was at school now, I’d be termed as having ADS. Two minutes and I’m drifting.