222 Quotes by Judith Martin

GENTLE READER: You, sir, are an anarchist, and Miss Manners is frightened to have anything to do with you. It is true that questioning the table manners of others is rude. But to overthrow the accepted conventions of society, on the flimsy grounds that you have found them silly, inefficient and discomforting, is a dangerous step toward destroying civilization.

Eating grapes with a knife and fork is not what one would call refined. It is what one would call ludicrous.

Appearing to pay attention when someone is speaking is one of the cornerstones of real social interaction.

The truly essential bargain between host and guest requires the guest only to respond promptly, show up on time, socialize with other guests, thank the host, write additional thanks and reciprocate. You needn't bring anything.

The greater the controversy, the more you need manners.

Etiquette does not render you defenseless. If it did, even I wouldn't subscribe to it. But rudeness in retaliation for rudeness just doubles the amount of rudeness in the world.

The underlying principles of manners- respect, fairness, and congeniality.

I make a distinction between manners and etiquette - manners as the principles, which are eternal and universal, etiquette as the particular rules which are arbitrary and different in different times, different situations, different cultures.

The way one was brought up isn't an excuse for rude behavior.