965 Quotes by Karen Marie Moning

He made a lousy passenger, barking instructions I ignored.

Churches crack me up. They’re like money, a conspiracy of faith. Like everyone agreed to believe that not only is there a God, but he comes down and checks on folks, so long as they hang in certain places, put up alters, burn lots of candles and incense, and perform sit-stand-kneel and other wacky rituals that’d make a coven of witches not look OCD.

Now you know how I justify my addictions – if I can pay less for it than I would at Wal-Mart, I get to have it.

When she’d finally cranked up her favorite Godsmack CD in an effort to tune him out, he’d let out a roar that had rattled the windows in her car: By all that’s holy, woman, what is that hideous noise? Cease and desist! A battlefield at full charge could be no more cacophonous!

Kids. Pain in the ass. Don’t know why I ever made them. Hell on relationships.

Keeping vigil over her are two monsters of very different breeds but monster just the same. Death on her left. Devil on her right.

I don’t know about you, but I call impromptu vomiting harm.

She’s thirteen. Time will remedy that.

Ignoring it makes it irrelevant. No man wants his nudity to be irrelevant.