336 Quotes by Kevin Hearne

We don’t need to play her witch’s games. They always want to get you and your little dog, too.” “I knew I never should have let you watch The Wizard of Oz.” “Toto didn’t deserve that kind of trauma. He was so tiny.

Other people in my life right now, who help me forget all the other people I have buried or lost: They are truly magic for me.

That’s right, there’s free beer in Irish paradise. Everyone’s jealous.

I don’t speak Otter, ya dumbass. What are ya waitin’ for? Get over here so we can get back to the rez. Unless I’m talkin’ to a real otter, in which case I’m the dumbass and you can just stay over there.” I.

Wooo!’ he said, slamming his shot glass down and coughing a bit. ‘That’s good stuff.’ I agreed heartily. ‘Shall we do another one?’ I asked. ‘Oh no,’ Jesus said quietly, his eyes growing round. ‘This is one of those situations where I have to stop and ask myself, what would I do?

Damn all hieroglyphics for making the ancient Egyptians look cool. Those old gods were best left in oblivion; you’d think the fact that they appeared most often on tombs would be a big hint that they weren’t friendly.

Turns out that once you kill a god, people want to talk to you. Paranormal insurance salesmen with special “godslayer” term life policies. Charlatan’s with “godproof” armor and extraplanar safe houses for rent. But most notably, other gods...

Atticus makes gigantic mistakes at times. But there are also times like this one when he makes of his life a poem and achieves an apotheosis of sorts, when his years manifest as wisdom and he spies a path forward that no one else sees until he points it out. And in this case that means not allowing swords to fall where they may.

You are telling me that your lawyer is a bloodsucking vampire?