239 Quotes by Kinky Friedman

I don't believe in carrying a weapon. If somebody wants to shoot me, he'll have to bring his own gun.

I don't see how the people who created the problem can fix it. Texas is worth fighting for, and the best way to fight is to get the politicians out of politics.

I want to fight the wussification of the State of Texas. I want to rise and shine and bring back the glory.

I'd felt that a man without a woman was like a neck without a pain.

I'm not pro-life, and I'm not pro-choice. I'm pro-football.

I've been in true love many times. I just try to avoid it as much as possible. For if there's one thing I know about true love, it is that sooner or later, it results in a hostage situation.

Like most of us, I determined that I'd rather be a large part of the problem than a small part of the solution.

The only thing that really differentiates Texas from any other place in the world is the proclivity of its people to urinate outdoors and to attach a certain amount of importance to this popular pastime.

I want to be governor [of Texas] because I need the closet space.