370 Quotes by Lewis Black

He smiles so much, I don’t think he has a central nervous system.

In four days, I experienced five seasons. It was thirty, it was sixty, it was ninety, then it was twelve! And on the last day, there was thunder, lightning, and snow – together! And I hadn’t done drugs.

A lot of the times I’m looking at something that I discover is part of a larger framework and not just a couple jokes. I see that it’s a set, a story that I’ll be telling. Sometimes I get lost in that.

Well first of all, I’d just like to say that 2005 was a great year, if you like swimming through crap.

Wow, you survived a blackout. You’re made of stronger stuff than ice cream.

Nobody in college races home and says, ‘I can’t wait to see the news! I can’t wait to see who CBS is going to hire!’

You can never put too much pork in your mouth as far as I’m concerned.

All food is comfort food. Maybe I just like to chew.

I'm a Jew.