65 Quotes by Louie Anderson



  • Author Louie Anderson
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    A real estate closer. Oh, what's that? I'm a real estate opener. What is a real estate closer? You mean at the end where you've got to sign all those papers?

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  • Author Louie Anderson
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    I really try to have fun. If I don't have fun, you won't have fun. That's what my gift is: to relieve people from a little of the pain and comfort in their lives by allowing my comedy to distract them. A good laugh is almost as good as any doctor visit.

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  • Author Louie Anderson
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    I was with a famous comedian when a young fan walked up and asked for an autograph. The comedian blew him off. I'll never forget the look on the young boy's face. He was devastated.

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  • Author Louie Anderson
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    You have to be funny about it and honest about it. You can't leave yourself out of that mix. You have to be honest enough to say, I'm that messed-up one in the family.

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    Everybody wanted to make it. One guy makes it. In a family when one guy makes it... 'Hey ain't you going to help us out?'

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  • Author Louie Anderson
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    I'm a 7 o'clock act. My people want to go to a show, a dinner and then go home and go to bed.

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