160 Quotes by Louise Rennison

The tannoy is crackling but I can only hear heavy breathing and snuffling. ...Uh-oh, the tannoy is crackling again."Sorry about that, ladies and gentlemen, I momentarily lost hold of my pie.

Apparently if you want to get a boy to like you, you go sort of mysterious and icy and cool. That’s what my cousin said and she has loads of boyfriends and snogging-type experiences.

My cousin Georgia says that boys are like gazelles. She says the get alarmed when they get close to girls. And they have to leap off into the woods like gazelles in trousers. Or have I just made that up?

BiologyThe film turns out to be about bees. It is a film about a bee center. How crap is this going to be? An hour laterThat was the best thing I have seen for ages. We made Miss Wilson rewind the bit where the two queens were having a bitch fight.

I am not an ice cream come! I am a human being!

And the kittykats would have to erect scaffolding and a pulley to get him down. Mind you, I wouldn't put that past them. Sometimes when they are behind the sofa supposedly purring, I think they are drilling.

How do you make yourself not like someone?

Its okay I'm wearing really big knickers.

Mr. Darcy was in Pride and Prejudice and at first he was all snooty and huffy; then he fell in a lake and came out with his shirt all wet. And then we all loved him. In a swoony way.